My fear is the final crossover, from life on to death. The fear of crossing the threshold. So here it comes.
It is there waiting!
Waiting at the threshold
Like a gentle breeze
Like the first ray of sun’s hue
Like the soon to disappear morning dew!
Like a waft of nature’s perfume
Mingled with labour’s sweat
A butterfly’s touch on the honeyed flower
The night watcher’s vigil
The taste of life’s blood
And like the gentle footfalls of the night creatures
It is waiting as part of life’s features!
Ah! When I come afore it….
It is me ! I see
A mirror, I realize!
But with a difference
That takes you in as if
It is an entrance!
Not until you touch
You don’t realize much!
It is a threshold
Through which you disappear
And yet see it happen as it appears.
A strange supplication
Which intrigues and repels at once
You want to go beyond
Yet wish not to relinquish your stand!
Then! A moment came
When I flew through the window frame
As I drove towards my ‘home’
Stead I met the blinding truck lights
In that glorious second I thought I was “home”!
I saw my garden but blooming in ‘gold’
I saw my kids- even Amy, whom I thought ‘lost’
Oh! My mother!-hale and hearty!
Trotting on her feet and no wheels!
Oh! My mom! Oh! My Mom!
Yes! Dear son!- a scratchy voice boomed
The darkness and the pain on my arms screamed.
I had been ‘somewhere’
Which for others is ‘no where’.
I knew then!-it was ‘that’ door
Through which we all have to pass
Which no one can pass
And I had come too closely to pass.
It is there in our lives
Like the unseen trace of dusk rays
Like the unheard tremor
When the globe trotters thither
Like the unsettled sweat
On a labourer’s heart!
When I come afore it
Ah! I see myself again
Battered and tattered but, whole in my grain.
Having teetered precariously on that plain
I have nothing to lose but to gain.
Now I know to see through
the beguiling door that sucks you through!
I have heard many share
Their visions so clear
To which I had no ear!
Knowing that one
Hath helped me stop bemoan
Of which there’s none to spare!
I shall live every moment!
As ever fervent
Think of no torment
For I shall never lament
Whatever the life for me is ‘meant’.
At least now I am aware
That when the ‘time’ comes
We all must become
A fond memory
An oft repeated name initially
Only to fade away slowly!
When the ‘time’ comes
That ‘threshold’ will beckon
And, you must ‘go’ as you have no time to reckon.
So I shall ‘live’ my life un-forfeiting
For I know the ‘threshold’ is waiting!